Devion's Views #263

MARCH MADNESS (posted March 8, 2023) 


Is your boss a jerk; or worse...a creepy, harassing a..hole?

Are you desperately seeking a change of employment?

Or maybe need a second job to make ends meet...something not too demanding?

Does your skills-set include an aptitude for:

Meeting strangers?

Hanging out with old people?

Attending meetings about meetings?

Prevaricating and imputing?

Debating, discussing, gossiping?

Travel to exotic locales for meets with international counterparts?

If the aforementioned characteristics fits you like your proctologist's rubber glove (snap), and have friends or relatives in high places with political influence, this might just be your salvation:

There are fifteen unbelievable, fantabulous job-openings (right now) offering:

Basic annual salary $164,500

Free housing allowance of up to $26,500

Job comes with an office, staff, money for research and general office expenses

Free rail and air travel

Generous sick leave and vacation leave benefits

Several holiday breaks every year

Highfalutin job title

Mandatory retirement at age 75, with an indexed pension.

Successful candidates will join an exclusive 105-member club where...

Members set their own rules, have no accountability and (best of all) no boss

Nobody can force members to do any (real) work

Members cannot be fired

Members' work-venue is super-flexible. Wherever they happen to be, at any time, is peachy-keen OK under the self-imposed club rules. Members may do their "work" in The Red (colour of embarrassment) Chamber, at home, the cottage, in Florida, Barbados, France, Mexico, Italy, where several members prefer to "toil"...especially during our harsh Winter months.

Precisely, what the 105 members of the Senate Chamber of 'Sober Second Thought' contribute to the Canadian economy or Canadian democracy is a closely guarded state secret.

To ensure the secret is never revealed and their gravy-train will ever be derailed by an enraged mob of angry taxpayers, new members are quietly ushered into the Chamber where a senior-member (appropriately attired in the clubs oath garb - a white bed sheet and serious-face clown mask) administers 'The Mad Hatter's Oath of Secrecy' (similar to Catholic clergy) "Loose lips sink ships, institutions, governments and in particular endangers our pecuniary privileges."

OH-OH, somebody's been talking to the media. 

This week investigative reporters from the Globe and Mail newspaper revealed - The Senate has sat for (only) 104 days since November 2021. Twenty five senators, on average, have missed each of the 37 legislative votes over that time. Several members have cast fewer than four of 19 votes since Parliament resumed sitting in the Fall of last year. Skipping votes is on the rise. Some members even complained about the workload, being exhausted and in dire need of a vacation.

It's outrageous/galling that just as the annual CRA heist to pick our pockets begins, and while millions of Canadians try to survive pay cheque to pay cheque, are forced by their government to pay $126.7 million (this year) to support a bunch of free-loading, unelected, politically connected hangers-on.

It's ironic - March is supposed to be 'fraud prevention month'.

Long forgotten is PM 'little potato' promising to reform the Senate. Just more insipid political codswallop (translation: BULLSHIT!). Is Justin hoping, like other promises, we'll simply forget and carry on picking up the tab?

If, as we've been conditioned to believe, the Senate is essential to maintaining our democracy, these people should not be appointed by the governing party leader.

Senators should be elected by and accountable to the people. Otherwise, disband this useless, expensive, unnecessary, embarrassing government appendage.

                                                            QUOTES OF THE WEEK

"Anybody that says words hurt, has never been punched in the face". - Chris Rock, comedian, at the first-ever event shown in real time on Netflix, March 4, 2023, about the infamous slapping incident involving him and Will Smith at the 2022 Oscars.

"In 2016, I declared: I am your voice. Today, I add: I am your warrior. I am your justice. And for those who have been wronged and betrayed: I am your *retribution". - Donald J. Trump, Emperor-in waiting 'Crazy Pants', in a two-hour authoritarian diatribe filled with falsehoods and inaccurate claims at the Conservative Action Conference (CPAC), March 4, 2023, basking in the accolades and cheers of a whack-a-doodle mob of scary zealots.

*Retribution: Punishment imposed for purposes of repayment or revenge for the wrong committed.

The Master Bullshitter is back, campaigning for reelection in November 2024.

We are increasingly inundated not only by lies and disinformation fed to us by politicians, business leaders and social media. Sadly, we are powerless to do anything about it.

"The deadliest bullshit is odourless, and transparent." - William Gibson

                                            TOOTH FAIRY INFLATION

The Tooth Fairy payout for a single tooth:

1940 - 5 cents

1964 - 25 cents

1998 - $1.50

2023 - $7.50

Ron Devion, No Guts, No Glory