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Devion's Views #170

CRAZY - CREEPY - TOPSY TURVY (posted Nov. 11, 2018)

Lewis Carroll's 1871 sequel "Through the Looking Glass" had Alice climb through a mirror into a world where she finds that, just like a reflection, everything is reversed, including logic.

A land where, up is down, a Red King and a Blue Queen do battle; where alternative facts and lies confuse and confound.

Just like in TRUMP-LANDIA, on a typical day...

November 7, 2018 - The day after the US mid-term elections.

Senior politicians representing the Red and Blue teams rush to podiums to declare their side won.

Addison Mitchell (two-chins) McConnell Jr., mumbles his way through his press conference, trumpeting (pun intended) Republican gains in the Senate.

Nancy Patricia D'Alesandro Pelosi (one facelift shy of the wax museum Hall of Fame) hoarsely plods through her press conference, praising the impressive "Blue wave" Democrat gains in the House.

It was left to the media-savviest of them all, Emperor 'Crazy Pants', to once again deftly capture the days headlines. Holding an aggressive, self-serving, self-aggrandizing, snippy, testy, rambling, insulting, 90-minute press conference, claiming another best-ever fantastical victory for himself...because, and everybody knows this, "I'm a very stable genius".

Immediately following the press conference, in a stunning break with protocol, he orders suspending the "hard" press pass of CNN's Jim Acosta, barring his access to the White House "until further notice"...for doing his job. 

One hour passes.

While the Emperor hides in the oval office, Chief of Staff, retired Marine Corps General, John (the Church Lady) Francis Kelly, is dispatched to inform US Attorney General, Jeff (Mr. Magoo) Sessions, "you're fired"...for doing his job and respecting the constitution.

Bypassing "normal succession" i.e., to appoint the Deputy Attorney General, Rod (Mr. Peepers) Rosenstein to replace Sessions, 'Crazy Pants' appoints his "Magoo-office-mole" - Magoo's chief of staff, Matt Whitaker - Acting US Attorney General.

The Emperor then strips Mr. Peepers of responsibility to oversee the Mueller investigation and gives it to his mole. Remember, he's a stable genius.

The strategic objective: Dig a deep hole, preferably underneath a decaying nuclear plant somewhere in Russia, and bury Special Prosecutor Bob Mueller's report on Russian collusion and related matters from ever seeing the light of day...before the Democrats take control of the House of Representatives in January.

Reminiscent of Richard Nixon's Saturday Night massacre; the Watergate coverup imbroglio. Seasoned journalists are calling what Trump is doing ten times worse than what Nixon did.

Meanwhile...in Nevada.

Voters resoundingly elect Republican, Dennis Hof, to represent them in the Nevada State Assembly.

This, despite Mr. Hof being accused of sexual assault and rape.

Brothel owner (the Love Ranch Vegas) and reality TV "star", Hof, enjoyed referring to himself as the "Trump of Pahrump", "America's Pimp" and the "P. T. Barnum of Booty".

However, there was a minor problem that Nevada voters, possibly having consumed too much legal pot, either didn't notice or care about.

Weeks before voting day, Dennis Hof was found dead in his brothel.

Nevadians obviously prefer voting for a dead anti-tax, gun-rights Republican pimp, rather than any live Democrat.

While on the topic of guns, there have been 307 mass shootings in America so far this year.

The US Gun Violence Archive defines a mass shooting as a single incident in which four or more people are shot and/or killed, not including the shooter.

"Real power is - I don't even want to use the word - FEAR" - Donald Trump, March 31, 2016.

FEAR without HOPE will ultimately ignite the American powder keg.

    SHOW AND TELL STARRING TWEEDLEDUMB AND TWEEDLEDEE

Little kids are curious. Learning about others is part of growing up.

When a little boy says to a little girl, "I'll show you mine if you show me yours", everyone understands there is no ill-intent behind the request. It's a normal part of early learning.

However, its a different matter when adults use social media to expose their "shortcomings" (physical and psychological)...especially "mature" politicians.

2011 - Anthony David Weiner, a seven term Democratic congressman, introduced us to a new social-media term..."sexting".

Mr. Weiner was caught exposing his "shortcomings" to several women on his Twitter account.

He quietly "resigned" from Congress.

2013 - While running in the New York mayoral race, Weiner (he never gives up) did it again, using an exotic cover alias "Carlos Danger".

2016 - This time creepy "Carlos" involved a minor and the FBI got involved.

2017 - Weiner was declared a sex offender and sentenced to 21 months in prison.

It took six years to finally put this serial-sicko behind bars.

The parade of predator rogues continues apace as the 'Me-too' movement emboldens women to expose their harassers.

2018 - Our contender for the North American Sleaze Championship Trophy, holder of several senior government portfolios and veteran conservative, Mr. Tony (the Gazebo) Clement.

Last week, our champion informed his boss, Andrew (Dimples) Scheer, he has been "sexting" his privates...but trust me boss, it was only one time.

Without hesitation and with a compassionate heart, young Dimples believes Uncle Tony, allowing Gazeboman to remain in caucus.

24 hours pass - Media pressure intensifies. Uncle Tony confesses it happened more than once and he's being extorted by someone, "a foreign actor", demanding 50,000 Euros to keep quiet.

Alarm bells scream - "Kompromat" - Clement served on the ultra-secret 'National Security and Intelligence Committee'. Uncle Tony is a target of foreign agents.

Members of this committee, breaching a confidence, face 14 years in the hoosegow.

Many women offer their view of Clement, they find being near him "creepy".

Once again Dimples faces the media. The embarrassed rookie leaves the impression of a naive, indecisive, too trusting of party veterans and weak, leader.

The revelation that Uncle Tony's "reputation" was known to many, brings to light a serious problem with the quality and effectivness of the vetting process for ministers and those who serve on high security committees.

                           Kompromat...in the good old days

When television was young in the 1960's...

Intrepid CBC reporter, Larry Zolf, camera rolling, knocks on the door of Associate Defence Minister, Pierre Sevigny's home.

The door opens a crack to reveal it's Mr. Sevigny.

Zolf asks a leading question. The reply comes in the form of a bop on Larry's noggin delivered from the minister's cane.

Why would a senior government minister act so aggressively towards a member of the press?

At the time, Sevigny and George Hees were important ministers in PM, John Diefenbaker's, Conservative government.

George and Pierre resigned suddenly and mysteriously, just before the 1963 election.

Years later, it was publicly revealed that both honourable gentlemen were having a dalliance, aka Bunga-Bunga, with a German woman of dubious antecedents, a well known Montreal based prostitute, Frau Gerda Munsinger.

It was known by security services, Ms. Munsinger, had contacts with Russians and, as such, constituted a security risk...explaining the sudden exit of two high level government ministers before the '63 election.

The scandal finally broke out in the House of Commons in 1966 and the rest is history.

Today's sophisticated technology makes Kompromat easier and more dangerous for anyone entrapped - the reason why Emperor 'Crazy Pants' so fears the release of the Mueller report.

"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything"

"The man who does not read has no advantage over the man who cannot read"

"Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness, and many of our people need it sorely on these accounts. Broad, wholesome, charitable views of men and things cannot be acquired by vegetating in one little corner of the earth all ones lifetime"

All quotes are from a real genius, Mark Twain.

Ron Devion, No Guts, No Glory